Who Needs Love?

Valentine's Day- The time of year when everyone's "special someone" gets to feel extra special and the rest of us get to watch. Yes, the forteenth of February is fast approaching and I'm just not feeling it. In fact, I think the Valentine's train may be about to squash me flat. My friends sit aboard, on their comfortable velvet seats, arm in arm, oblivious to my suffering.It seems lusicrous that a fifteen year old girl would refer to herself as singe, but it feels like the appropriate term. maybe it's the unrealistic portrayal of high school in TV shows and movies that makes a boyfriend seen as vital as an arm or leg. Perhaps it's the multitudes of teens and even preteens declaring their everlasting love for each other.Whatever the cause, recently there's been a change. Couples don't make me feel sad or envious anymore. They make me feel sick. "Why the change of heart?" you may ask. I'll tell you: it's because the word 'love' no longer means what it once did. No, now love is just the word girls use to manipulate boys into watching "The Notebook" and boys use to get into girls pants. It means "Sure, you'll do until i see something shinier". My sister is twelve and last year a friend of hers got her first boyfriend. About a week in they were "in love". Two months later they broke up over msn.I guess The Pussy Cat Dolls were right about one thing. I don't need a man to make it happen. Not on Valentine's Day or any other time of year. I refuse to feel as though I'm missing something just because a bunch of twelve year olds are buying each other hideous red and pink toys. They'll be broken up in a day or two anyway.

This is another piece I wrote for English(a while ago obviously). Tell me what you think :)

Cat xx

A poem...

Sorry I haven't posted in a while. My life is spectacularly uninteresting at the moment. This is a poem I was assigned to write for English. It had to start with

"I remember

my childhood"

and have no more than four words per line and I actually ended up with something I'm quite pleased with, so I thought I see what you guys thought. Don't be afraid to be honest (but not nasty please)

I remember

my childhood

my neighbours

new baby

who

made

me

feel

so old.

We started

to visit
my sister

and I

and all the other

kids on the street

to see

Tom, Nat

and Maya

in

their nice
little
house.

We would talk

and laugh

and we'd bake

and read stories

or tell our own

over the years

as Maya

learnt to speak

she had birthdays

that we celebrated

playing games

and eating cake.

A lively garden

they had

full of

colourful plants

they grew carrots
that we picked

and munched

as we chatted
we could never wait
for them to grow
to their full size
but Nat and Tom
didn't mind.

Nat told us
tall tales

about

their house

and

a young ghost boy

who haunted it

she was

so

convincing

it sent chills

up my spine

I knew they

weren't real

but it felt

like they were.

I remember the stories

I remember

the baking

I remember the garden

I remember

my childhood.

"It's like totally kind what you're doing, but it won't make any difference"

Thank you Seli for giving me the Kreativ Blogger award! I won't complete the task because I did it just a few blogs ago here, but genuinely, thanks a bunch and a half.

I was also tagged by Zmaga for Cassie's Therapy Video tag, which I haven't posted in a while and which I absolutely love, so here we go:

source Abracadabra, Wow!
I like boys who like to think and girls who are nice to everyone.
I like doing methodical things like maths.
I like reading Harry Potter, no matter how many times.
I like drinking coffee, eating slices and talking with good friends at nice cafes.
I like waking up on a Sunday and realizing I can sleep in.
I like Bob Dylan lyrics.
I like netball training, it makes me feel healthy.
I like sunny parks on warm days with lots of friends.
I like finding great clothes when I don't expect to.
I like dancing to bad songs.
I like discovering new artists.
I like when someone makes me feel loved.
I love writing and reading.
Today I had a delicious chocolate slicey thing,
In some ways, I love everything. It’s less, it’s less of a thing to like, it’s less distinct, it’s less particular, I like things that I like but I love everything. There’s more choice in like, Cos even the worst things have things you love in them. I don’t know what you mean about things I hate…
I hate when some one's sad, and I can't help.
I hate regretting things that I can't fix or change.
I hate being laughed at.
I hate liking people I shouldn't.
I hate being let down by people I love.
I hate jogging but in a way, I like how I feel afterwards.
I hate waiting rooms.
I hate remembering my old self and not liking who I was.
I hate this, wow... sorry.
I'd like to tag both the Kreativ Blogger Award (in which you must write seven facts about yourself and tag it along to seven other bloggers) and Cassie's Therapy Video Tag along to: Maly, Camelgirl, Julia, Frangi, Phoebe, Scarz and Catherine. Enjoy :D
Cat xx

Have a read?

As I walked out onto the porch, I saw him for the second time. He was sitting on the brick wall outside his house now, where the bins were kept and the mailbox was. He had a cigarette in his hand and was looking onto the street, his brow furrowed, as though he was looking for something, or thinking about something important. For some reason, he looked at that moment, like everything I wanted. Something that was interesting; mysterious. Something I hadn’t been able to put my finger on until that moment. I so desperately wanted to talk to him, to know him. I stood there on my porch for a minute or two, watching him and trying to think of an excuse to approach him. Eventually I walked over, trying to look confident and jumped up to sit beside him on the wall.
“Can I have a drag?” I asked.
I knew how pathetic I probably sounded, but knew immediately that it was worth it, when he looked at me and a pack of butterflies went crazy inside me. He just studied me for a few, long moments, and then said:
“You smoke?”
The truth was I didn’t. I had before, but found it awful.
“A bit.” I answered.
“You shouldn’t. It’ll kill you.” He said, but handed me the cigarette.
I put the cigarette to my lips, trying to recall what Leah had told me the one time I’d tried this before. Taking it away from my lips, I passed it back to him and exhaled.
“I’m Elodie.” I offered, looking at him.
“Mitchell.” He replied, not turning to look back at me.

This is a story I've recently started writing, and I was wondering if anyone could give me some feedback on this paragraph? If you could tell what you think, and also whether you think the two should get together or just become really good friends, that'd be awesome. Thanks :)
Cat xx

Sunrise...

Good morning all!

It's bright an early on Wednesday morning and I didn't sleep at all last night. A friend and I sat up all through the dark, chatting and watching "Sleeping Beauty". There's something ever so whimsical about being awake as the sun rises, and how quickly it happens. One moment we were whispering to black masses in complete darkness and the next we were speaking in normal tones surrounded by the fully announced morning sunlight.

The Earth is a wonderful and ever changing place.

Cat xx

There's No Denying Clouds Are Awesome...

There's something so wonderful about clouds.

They seem so impossible to me.

So beautiful and so simple.

Fluffy, white and delicate.

An other-worldly, visual escape.

Cat xx

I really do love this world quite a lot...

Good evening everyone,

How are you all tonight?

Why do we always want to know? What makes us want to know what the meaning of life is? What happens after we die? If there's a god, if there's more than one? Of course, those questions have each their own answers. We want to know the meaning of life because we fear there isn't one, we wonder about the end because we're afraid that it really is the end and we hope for a god because we're afraid that it really is all down to us. It feels to me like it all comes down to fear. Why can't we accept life as we see it and just live? We all search for the peace we'll find in knowing, but I think there's a certain peace in feeling that what you know is all you need to know. I'm not anti-science or anti-religion, but I don't think these things, these questions, should dominate us. I just wish we could all take a deep breath and live.

Cat xx

Images sourced from the wonderful Sandra Juto.

Remember to smile...

The ever wonderful Sanchez posted her monthly Bridget Lowry Inspired Post and I thought I'd follow her lead. Here we go.

I like sunshine, lollipops and rainbows.
I love remembering and anticipating.
I wish everyone could be happy and we could all smile together.
I remember going to the beach every day after school.
I will never finish loving the world.
I used to be sad and angry and feel unwanted.
but now I know better and I find myself rather happy.
If I had a magic wand I'd make the grass green, the sky blue and shape all the clouds like hearts.
and if I was god I'd live in those heart shaped clouds.

"Young people think oldness is the bottom of a mountain. In truth, it is the top. I am old, because I have lived a whole life. I have climbed a long, long way. When I look back the way I have come, I can see the town I was raised in, and my mother and father. I see houses I lived in, friends that I made, people and pets that I loved. I see the wrong turns that I took, places where I tripped, places where I skipped and sang and ran. I can see for years and years. To have such a view, you have to be standing at the top of a mountain."

"Love is like moonlight or thunder, or rain on a tin roof in the middle of the night: it is one of the things in life that is truly worth knowing."

-Some lovely quotes from "The Ghost's Child" by Sonya Hartnett.

Cat xx

Words...

Sometimes a thought occurs to me,

It isn't with me for long,

Not even long enough for me to fully comprehend it,

But it is always a happy thought,

Or a peaceful one, or a comforting one,

And for a while I feel lighter,

Life feels simpler,

The enormity of this thought engulfs me,

I can't quite grasp it,

It is a secret I almost discovered,

A part of the world I nearly understood,

And I am reminded of how much more there is,

It's lovely.

Plastic Knife...

"I lay my filthy blanket down on the pavement and spread out my wares for the world to see.

I hand-wrote a sign on the grime encrusted cardboard of a box I found in the gutter.

The sign said, 'Will cure a broken heart'"

Jenny Kiss'd Me

Jenny kiss'd me when we met,
Jumping from the chair she sat in,
Time, you thief, who love to get,
Sweets into your list, put that in,

Say I'm weary, say I'm sad,
Say that health and wealth have missed me,
Say I'm growing old, but add,
Jenny kiss'd me

I had to recite a poem in English and I thought this was very sweet indeed. So sweet that I thought I'd post it here. Hope you like it.
Cat xx

Writers Block. Shudder.

I finally got my new header to work! It's very exciting for me. It's a bit blurry (tiny bit) but I'm such an "Alice in Wonderland" nut that I don't mind. Sorry my posts have been so irregular lately, I've got a case of writer's block! If you like writing/ are a writer and you just read that, chances are your whole body seized up in fear, because writer's block is a terrible, terrible thing. Don't worry though, I am determined to fight off this illness and I'll be back with some interesting posts soon. Sorry for this crappy one.
Cat xx

The inner poet in me...

doesn't exist. Really. Poetry is hard! It has to be either funny or meaningful to be good and god knows I can't do funny so that leaves meaningful. Then there's the balance between "Wow, I really get what she's trying to say" and "Wow, not only is that a complete piece of crap, but it's so cheesy that I think I have to go and throw up now. Excuse me." If you're lucky enough to find this balance you then have to make it so it's compressed enough to be poetry, but people can still understand the message. You tend to go for "Oh, I feel so moved by those few but powerful words" not "Oh, does she have that thing where she just spits out random words as they come to her? How sad." Unfortunately, my occasional attempt poetry has no balance, and anybody who reads will be both queasy and under the impression that I'm mentally ill. Ah well...
Cat xx

Poetry is alot harder than it looks...

Aged statues crumble,
Autumn leaves float to the earth,
Life reaches its end.

That is a haiku that I wrote for my creative writing class. I love that class, it's amazing. Anyway I hope you like it.
Cat xx